Jiraiblogging - Blog Posts

70 followers >////<

Tyssmmm, I dont deserve all of you lol

IM ALSO 5 DAYS CLEAN NOW !!!!! It's so hard, i might relapse tonight, but still 5 days is a lot :]

I really want to cut off my friends because their so toxic and make me feel like shit, but I don't have anyone else to hang out with at school :/

I might not even talk to them, but at least I don't look like a fucking loner :(

One of them in particular is pissing me off cause they always tell me about their relationship struggles or their interests, and whenever I tell them something they dont listen. I can't care about them at all atp, like your partner doesn't like that you like men ?? Well I fucking told you that they were toxic I can't help you. The fuck do they want me to do ??? They send me weird images or weird things in general, and I tell them to stop and they never apologise and continue. They js make me uncomfortable and they used to punch me alot ╯︿╰ I fucking hate my friends, I'm gna jump into a meatgrinder.

hypersexual isn’t just being horny all the time btw please actually shut the fuck up

I want to slitttt their throaatssss, it's not FAAIRRRRR, HOW COME THEY GET TO BE TOGETHER AND IM ALL SAD AND PATHETIC AND ALONE !!!!!

I was imagining the perfect partner in class again >////< Im going to try to get in classes without all of my current 'friends' because i just neeeeed to meet other people and find a partner whos js so nice >////<

Saw my moots @sw33tl1f3 do this poll so I'm doing it ^^

:3

Me when my blades are dull so to keep myself sane I have to look at shblr until I can get some new ones 😔💔

"No M, you can't carve the name of all your mutuals and friends onto your body !"

God forbid a boy has hobbies 🙄

"you're all jirai enough" Until one of us is fat, pudgy, copes/deals with trauma in a different manner than what's commonly perceived, doesn't dress "dark girly", is transgender, is gay, is a man (????there's a literal term for Male jirais), is black, isn't European, isn't Japanese, isn't American, is from a second or third world country, *can't* dress "dark girly", doesn't self harm, doesn't do drugs, doesn't do alcohol, is hypersexual, isn't an NSO fan, is pro-recovery (that one's a little debatable but whatever), isn't a female in general, isn't deathly pale, doesn't have an ED, doesn't have "soul crushing" trauma, is undiagnosed, self harms but not by cutting, and the list goes on

It’s so weird that people’s first thought isn’t cutting themselves when they’re having a shitty day. Crazyyyyyy like I’m about to have the time of my life with my blades when I get home.

Another thing I hate with jirai tt is that whenever there's a darker skinned or plus sized jirai they don't classify them as one :(((

I wish I had a reason to attend school :P

I’ve been alone before, but being alone again still hurts.

Jirai tiktok when a minor can't afford the expensive blouses that adults can >:((

(seriously wtf is wrong with Jirai tiktok, they revolve it all around the fashion and whenever they see someone who actually has a more explosive disorder they get angry that there not doing it correctly...like...that's the whole point...Jirai means Landmine, and Landmine's explode...)

“you hurt yourself so what’s the difference of me hitting you” im mentally ill and your just crazy.

“Jirai Kei is dying” thank god now all the posers are gonna start selling their shit for lower prices on Vinted because it’s “less desirable”

Im posting these to close to each other 😭

More make-up and sfw training!!!

(Bc living rn is making me wanna go...uhm...do some reaalllyyyy hard and deep...make-up...)

Tw: realistic blood and cuts :3👍

Im js a rlly good make-up artist, it's all fake and for my classes >////<

I think I got baaabbyyy styro??? Idk tho, I dont wanna hype myself up cause yikes :P

me core after downing the whole box of chips cause i was a lil sad🤤🤤

Like ??? Is thattt styro?? Or js a deeper cat scratch :P I think I'm being dramatic I'm gna jump.

Anyway :P here's all of my leg🤤🤤 I like fucking 10 sliced in that big bleeding one (the moot who got sent the video can vouch for me ~)

Oh, my thigh is just begging to be cut..

YOU ARE VALID!! it doesn't matter whether you had a good childhood or good parents, no trauma or bully experience. You feel how you feel for a reason, and that reason no matter how small it may seem compared to others is valid.

They hurt ╯︿╰

tw: realistic sfw and make-up:P

I "cleaned" them up but they stinging now :(((

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:(((((

I noticed to liked my post about hypersexuality and I noticed you like cinnamoroll, so I thought I'd digitally give you a cinnamoroll plush.

You may save them as the background on your phone, computer or laptop, witch ever you have Tumblr on so that when ever you open that device you see them and (hopefully) smile.

this kinda made me tear up. Tysm. I js cms because I was having the most disgusting thoughts about myself and others, and I didn't know how to stop it. idk if It's an episode or not, but his really js fucking made my night ♡♡♡♡♡ I can't thank you enough ♡♡♡

ur amazing and you dont even know it

lol ya I dont🤤🤤🤤🤤

I hate when my mother wants to "experiment" with food

I reeeealllyyy wanna go to a mental hos >_< no responsibility, no expectations just being as unhinged as I want and getting care !?!? Sounds fabulous

inside of me there are two wolves…

idk what happened to my day, but I feel really bad now. I guess that's what I wanted

I js feel very small. Like I want to be. I really want someone to care for me, and like me, and not make me feel bad. I'm very scared right now, I don't have anyone to help me, and its really scary. I know I kinda joke about suicide but I don't tell anyone about how bad it gets. I don't like getting violent thoughts to hurt myself, I just want to be held and taken care of, and understood that I can't be ok

Whatever, mb, my throat really hurts

KK therapy was alright today :3

My therapist convinved my mother to stop pestering with questions about my life, sooo yipiierrss !!!!

But now i feel weird, ebcause i feel happy without feeling manic and hyper...sooo uhhh, i might slit or sum to make myself feel worse again :3

ALTHOUGH I DOOOO WANNA KEEP UP SOME MOTIVATION TO WRITE, SO I MIGHT TRY TO GET SO MANY CHAPTERS OUT :D

idk if im gonna be able to keep myself stable enough to fake being non suicidal in therapy tmrw :P Plus i think my hearts gone again, so if i get hospitalised, uhhhh :(((( I'll cry :(( because i wont be alowed on my phone, and i need to be online otherwise i wont be able to get any attention ╯︿╰

I wanna be independent because that's how I've been taught to be, but whenever someone starts talking about having a partner or a friend group I get so sick with jealousy

Shes found someone else omfg how do I mess all this shit up this bad

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