Mywayofconversations - Blog Posts

A gentle reminder of us

“I would’ve love you for the wrong reasons, and I would’ve love you more for the right reasons. But one thing is for sure, we will tear and break each other apart.”

You are always at the back of my mind. Like a flicker of light I can’t seem to fix.

Is this still a part of moving on or I’m still a fool for you

More willing to let go than hold your hand.

Had to give myself a chance to live without you

‪“I never really stopped. You know? Loving you. It’s just... I’m better off without you.”‬

If she ever asks when I stopped loving her

And suddenly you can’t run from it anymore. You face it not to just overcome it, you face it just to end a suffering.

I still don’t know what my “it” is

Sober enough to check up on them at 4 in the morning.

‪The detachment that comes with love is unimaginable.‬

It’s what after of the aftermath of falling out. I wish it wasn’t with you.

Do you ever get the feeling of “on the verge of being distant” to a person you’ve become so closed with and the anticipation it comes with kills you and you feel heavy inside

It happened too soon when it shouldn’t.

There was a reason why I stayed silent over the past few months. I know that when I open up and speak, I’d only tell stories of you. That’s not part of my moving on.

It’s part of I’m falling into you all over again, I’m afraid there’s no getting up.

‪2017 thoughts written on December 1: It’s the kind of happy - or maybe maybe not happy. But just feeling. All feeling. The feeling where you feel relieved that you are in the moment. Alive and breathing and fighting.‬

2018 thoughts written on February 1: Breathe. Free trial of 2018 just ended. You’re gonna be in for a year of self love and drive yourself to be better.

How did 2017 break me though

It’s okay that I am alone. I am free and I get to own my freedom. I admit, it feels lonely sometimes. But, I get to know myself a little better and I get to grow on my own. This is an achievement for me, really. To know and focus my value without someone else’s help.

It came up to my mind when people around me talks about wanting to be in a relationship. I mean, we gotta love ourselves before we love someone else, right?