STOPPPP I SAID OUT LOUD 'I can't go back to therapy cause what if they fix me and i lose my swag' AND FROM ACROSS THE PARK RED HOOD POINTED AT ME AND SAID "HE GETS IT"
why is this my life now 😭😭
dadwave
Dick, texting Wally: hey, patrol kinda boring tonight, do you want to play 20 questions?
Wally: yeah sure man, what's your favorite family meal?
Dick: triangles.
Dick: do you like boys?
Wally: yeah.... I... Came out to you first...
Dick: just checking. You free on Friday?
Wally: yeah?
Dick: good, I'll pick you up at 12. Bye.
Wally: ... Okay but our game? Hello??
Outside of the texts
Dick: I asked him out.
Barbara: saw, you technically didn't but better than you pinning for him all day. Good luck.
Dick: don't need it, I'm Dick Grayson, I got this.
Bruce: oh no, you don't, I said the same thing, you're gonna fail bud.
Dick, looks at Bruce funny: you are bad a pep talks.
Allen-west house hold
Wally: MOMMA HOW DO I KNOW HE ASKED ME OUT OR NOT!?
Iris, from the kitchen: WHAT THE TEXT SAY SWEETHEART?
Wally: IT SAYS "good, I'll pick you up at 12"!
Iris: HE'S TAKING YOU OUT ON A DATE BUT SHY A OUT IT! DRESS CASUAL.
Wally: THANKS MOMMA!
Barry: WHY NOBODY YELLING FOR ME FOR DATING ADVICE!
Wally: BECAUSE MOMMA FLIRTERD WITH YOU THE WHOLE TIME AND YOU WERE STUCK IN YOUR OWN HEAD, I NEED HELP NOT MORE PROBLEMS AND QUESTIONS!
Barry:
Barry: FAIR, ALSO WHY ARE YOU YELLING FROM YOUR BEDROOM YOU COULD HAVE SPEED DOWN HERE!
Wally: BECAUSE I'M EMBARRASSED!
Dick: Damian, why are you so thoughtful?
Damian: thinking about how to get revenge on Todd.
Dick [frowning]: for what?
Damian: the bastard gave me a parrot...
Dick: but that's great! I thought you liked animals!
Damian: yes, but he first taught this parrot to say, “Help, I've been turned into a parrot”
[GET REVENGE ON JASON]
-Bat chat-
Red Robin: "good argument, but have you considered the following?"
RR: *sends cat video by mistake*
Red Hood: "what does that have to do with anything?"
Robin: "no no, he's got a point"
Oracle: "he got you there, Jay"
RH: "this is a private chat"
O: "yeah, on my servers"
RR: "???"
I really need more stuff on some Joker Junior angst, along with Jason finding out about Joker Junior. Even better if you wanna pull in the whole Red Hood (Joker/Jason) Attacking Robin (Jason/Tim), both times when Robin was 15 years old and was supposed to be with someone/somewhere safe.
Hmm... I agree that more content about that would be fabulous. I especially love JJ fanart (there's some really cool ones on TikTok).
Fuck it. Here we go:
TW: torture, Joker Junior, violence, blood, flashback, dissociation, derealization, hallucinating(?)
Tim hands fly to his throat in a desperate attempt to rub away the urge to giggle. He's biting his lips hard enough to bleed in order to prevent them from twisting into a panicked grin.
He's pinned to the floor by a man using one of Joker's alias.
Just like old times, eh?
A snicker slips out at that, which only seems to enrage the man in red.
"Something funny, Placeholder?" The voice modulator in the helmet does nothing to hide the clear disdain and wrath curling through Red Hood. His grip tightens over his holsters, but he doesn't pull them out quite yet. The crimson helmet just glares down at Robin.
Red, red, red. He'd look so much better in Green.
Fuck. Note to self, Tim. JJ likes Red Hood.
Robin locks his face down at this revelation to keep a calm facade. He could try to dislodge the knives holding him hostage, but not with the perpetrator towering over him like this. "Nope. My bad, Hood. Got a little distracted. Where were we?"
The crime lord takes a few steps forward until he's next to the trapped bird. Somehow, he makes even the action squatting appear menacing. "This is the part where I torture you. Where I cut off a little bird's wings so you'll never fly again. Maybe then, B will learn."
Robin watches as Hood draws another knife. The crime lord twirls the blade between his fingers and tilts his head. There's a considering glint evident in his body language.
In a sick mockery of comfort, Red Hood trails the knife down Robin's cheek. It's too close to Joker's signs of "affection" after a round of shock treatment.
Junior shudders.
The leather jacket starts to morph into a lavender lounge coat and Tim blinks rapidly to clear his vision.
A sigh of relief escapes his lips when he's able to see Red Hood again.
The crime lord pauses. He tilts his head once more. Tim can feel the gaze studying him, but he's not sure why. He can't tell if the man is genuinely curious or if he's inspecting Robin like a bug trapped in plexiglass.
When the knife leaves his skin, Tim feels his shoulders lose an inch of tension.
"Don't get too comfortable. I've got a few questions before I snap your legs."
Tim can feel a jolt of pain flash through his legs at the claim. He grimaces at the notion of months off field.
Hood leans back onto his heels, fortunately giving the younger teen some space. It doesn't seem intentional, but it's better.
"You've been Robin for two years now?"
When Tim initially refuses to acknowledge the question, Hood raises the knife. Robin sighs and gives a nod.
The man hums and brings the hilt of the knife to his chin. The weird thinking pose blares an alarm in Tim's brain, but he can't quite piece together where he's seen it before.
"About eight months ago, the clown disappeared."
Phantom feelings of electricity run through Tim's body. His muscles twitch under the memory.
Red Hood leans closer. "Where is he?"
Tim can hear -
"You know better than that, Junior. Where's the smile for your old man?"
A desperate giggle bubbles up Tim's throat.
"Come on, son. You wouldn't want to make your mother sad, would you?"
Joker leans over Tim Junior with a wicked grin. He grips a blade and gestures to Junior's lips. "Do you want your dear old Dad to teach you to smile? Again?"
Junior shakes his head frantically as trembling lips split open in a facsimile of a smile. The motion pulls at his stitches scars.
Scars?
That's not-
Junior's smile starts to fall.
Red Hood Joker crosses his arms. "What the fuck are you smiling at?"
Junior still has a smile on his face (it can't drop), but his eyebrows furrow. "Dad?"
Joker flinches back.
Amethyst cloth flickers to bronze leather and then back again. Forest green hair morphs into a cherry red helmet. Junior watches it peer behind its shoulder before Joker's face turns back to him.
"Batman isn't here."
A cackle erupts from Junior's lips and dissolves into a fit of giggles. Joker peers at Tim Junior in confused horror. The kid turns his head more towards the man. A smile stretches and pulls the corner of his lips, highlighting the faint scars.
Junior Tim hears the man take a startled breath in.
"Batsy isn't Dad. Dad-"
Tim frowns as his gaze drifts away from the man. "I killed Dad. He's dead."
He pouts exaggeratedly before Junior dissolves into a fit of giggles. "Bam!" Both of his hands point an imaginary gun Red Hood's Joker's way. "Bam! Bam!" The hands recoil back as if actually shooting the man.
Tears start to stream down Junior's Tim's face. He fights to bring his lips away from a grin.
"Fuck." He's still grining. "Fuck!"
Red Hood, the cause of all of this, is just staring at Tim. He's observing the teen try to bring himself back to sanity inch by stupid fucking inch.
Tim's eyes dart around the room. He takes a deep breath in and, on the exhale, list something he sees. "Chair. Blender. Staff. Kni-"
Several more deep breaths in and out as he ignores all the knives in the room. "Light. Jacket. Cape. Couch. Lemon. Counter."
His hands paw at his utility breath as he keeps breathing. He grasps one of the sour candies and works on opening the wrapper. He pops it into his mouth and continues the breath exercise.
Red Hood is silent as he watches Robin pull himself back into reality.
It takes several more minutes before Robin's breaths return to normal. He lays there looking at the ceiling absolutely drained and done with this whole situation.
Finally, Tim turns his gaze to the crime lord.
"Can you just kill me already or get the fuck out?"
Red Hood responds by pulling off his helmet.
Tim blinks. Sighs. Then starts up his grounding techniques again.
I actually made it comic form lmao this was fun
Oliver: Want to hear my British accent?
Bruce: No.
Oliver: I’m going to do it anyway. Hey mate, fancy some beans on toast?
Bruce noticed Alfred pause his dusting, visibly straining to keep from hitting Oliver.
Bruce: Carry on.
Oliver: It’s nice out today, innit? Such a lovely Chewsday!
In a swift motion, Alfred grabbed a serving tray and knocked it against Oliver's head, sending the man sprawling forward onto the table, unconscious.
Alfred (muttering under his breath): Bloody American.
Bruce took a silent sip of his tea, trying to mask his amusement while Alfred took an early break.
I have an idea:
Tim is Damian's fave brother. He shows it by stabbing him, because in his world aka the loa, if someone is a threat it's a great compliment, and they are treated as such.
The batfam is freaking out bc Damian is trying to kill Tim but he's really just trying to show that he thinks Tim's a really competent person and totally worthy of being his brother.
ooooh this tis so crucnhy gimme a sec-
Timothy was being cruel to himself again. It wasn't uncommon, really, that the third youngest was overly critical of himself, especially concerning work related things, but every time set Damian's teeth on edge.
"Its such a stupid mistake! What am I?? Five!!?!?!" Tim ranted, waving the misprinted sheet around in the air. "Someone could've gotten hurt because of this!"
"Tim, it's not that big of a deal." Dick tried placatingly. "Not a big deal?" Tim shouted back. "What do you mean its not a big deal??? If Jason hadn't caught my dumb mistake one of you could've gotten hurt!" He shook his head in disgust at himself, dropping into a chair.
"Honestly Bruce should've fired me all those years ago. I am a horrible partner."
"Hey!" Dick protested, but Damian knew his eldest brothers arguing wouldn't get anywhere. Tim didn't believe any of the support Dick tried to give him, and was doubtful of even Bruce's praise, which was hard for any of them to brush off.
Damian tuned out his brothers angry argument, weighing the small dagger in his hand. Tim had gifted it to him, on a patrol they had run together oh so long ago.
"A gift." Tim had said. "From one Robin to the next." He hand winked then, grappling away. "Try not to stick it in my back, yeah?" He'd hollered into the wind, and Damian had smiled, in spite of himself.
And he had kept the promise. While Jason and even Dick had gotten plenty of blades lodged in certain places over the years, Damian had never truly attempted to harm Tim. Not in that way. Not anymore. But now...
Tim would never believe he was good enough if Damian didn't see him as worthy competition. He lifted the small dagger up and down a bit, testing how it moved. It was fine craftsmanship, he had to admit, and, though he hated to say it, if he wasn't so attached to it he might even use it more in battle. But, that was no matter. Timothy was distracted anyway.
Damian walked over casually, fighting the urge to creep, to sneak up, because that would only draw attention. Tim even leaned towards him, arm lifting to hug him, even as he continued arguing, eyes not even looking his way. The easy show of trust had Damian hesitate for a second, but he didn't dwell on it long.
Tim looked surprised when he spotted the knife sticking out of his side. "What's wrong?" Dick asked, puzzled as to why he had suddenly stopped speaking. Tim looked at the blade, then lifted his eyes to Damian's in confusion.
"I find you a worthy opponent Drake." Damian said softly. Tim's eyes widened in surprise a moment before Dick was on them, dragging Tim to the med bay while angrily shouting at Damian. But Tim's eyes never strayed from his little brothers face, gratitude shining in his eyes.
i'm so deep into the brainrot so are they