Switcheroo

Honestly this lines up with how my associates describe their interactions with Dren. They always talk about how he insists they are his assistants yet he makes them do all the work and doesn't help. I could tell you a few of the highlights of situations they may or may not have intentionally left him in. My favorite story was by far the bottle.

Chancellor,

Following up on my last ask, what do you think of Narsis Dren. Like I mentioned, every single one of my associates who has encountered him despises him. And from what I have heard his ego is bigger then Mannimarco's and possibly rivals that of Molag Bal (Also disregard any reports you have been getting of a Khajiit with glowing eyes, the less you ask about that particular matter the better)

I had, in fact, met Narsis Dren.

"I am an explorer of incomparable renown, the greatest delver into the most dangerous ruins of the past that had ever been!" he said.

Which was all nice, but that particular Ayleid ruin was on a private property of the Tharn estate and has for centuries served as our wine cellar with some extra security measures.

We didn't talk much that time, he gave me such a headache that I ventured into the "foreboding den of promising riches" myself, and when I emerged later with some liquid will to bother with nitwits, he was gone.

I ran into him years later in Reaper's March while I was gathering more information about Knhunzar'ri. He insisted that I could be his "assistant" while he searched the archive for... I don't know what exactly, and honestly I didn't care. The last I saw him, he was trying to get the Pendant of Lunar Flight off while he was hovering under the ceiling. I noticed only because he stopped getting under my feet for three minutes.

who has a total ban from the kitchen, a partial ban and who is allowed?

(writing a fic, its a passing line but im stucked bc im getting second thoughts every time i place a character in a category, thank you very much)

Allowed:

Alfred, by default

Dick, because he canonically can cook

Luke, because he buys the best ingredients

Bette, because she's hardly ever there

Kate, because she doesn't care enough to use it

Barbara, because she can work the smart fridge

Cullen, because he needs it emotionally

Duke, because he hasn't done anything yet

Conditionally allowed:

Jason, if he doesn't order takeout and claim credit for making it like he would in canon

Helena, if she doesn't launch into a food history lecture

Damian, if he needs a vegetarian snack

Steph, if she doesn't openly one-up Alfred's waffles

Carrie, if she doesn't recreate the candy spaghetti from Elf

Harper, to fix the oven

Banned:

Cass, for her mega-pie

Tim, for telling his friends to help themselves

Bruce, to comply with the Geneva Conventions

Verdict's still out:

Selina, because her food is great but she uses Ivy's mutant produce

@thefcguy I'm call bringing the pizza, I had no idea who else to tag so eh

Moot Sleepover Starting Now

@a-fucking-tornado

@silentlydying

@fairyb0ii

@tori-spring12

@survivingmyownlife

@spir4nts-lun4r

@back-totheoldhouse

@aloserwholikesheartstopper

@moomoomwahaha

@xoxonxo

JJ/Tim probably can’t go do anything related to the joker because he’d probably still have guilt because his brain thinks joker is still his dad, but also because joker would be a huge tigger to Tim.

The other bats probably weren’t told anything on why Tim doesn’t deal with the joker babs and Bruce just told them straight up that Tim doesn’t deal with joker and that was that

Sometimes when Tim is like having an emotional breakdown he wants his dad just to be faced with the fact that his dad is joker and probably not someone he should go to when emotional

To add on, Tim gets confused about who his dad is. Is it Jack? Bruce? Joker?

He misses his dad, but from a combination of the torture, brainwashing, and multiple father figures, he can't tell exactly whonhis actual dad is. Joker tried to overwrite himself as Tim's dad instead of Jack, so Tim has a hard time grasping that he could have three father figures instead of one (not that said father figures were good, but that's the role they played in his life at some point [willingly or not]).

Tim ends up missing his dad, but not knowing who his dad actually is. This is similar to people who have homesickness but don't know where "home" is.

If you're doing a JJ AU (combining JJ with other timelines/canon events or even just forgaging canon for its parts), you could play around with these dynamics.

Is Bruce a good dad but Tim, in his confusion with Joker, doesn't truly trust him?

Are Bruce and Jack horrible fathers? Does this make Tim have three fathers who have all hurt or failed him?

Does Tim get the JJ treatment before or after he becomes Robin?

Does Bruce know (like in the OG story), or does Tim keep it hidden from even him?

JJ is such a cool (and angsty) premise.

batman comic arcs are so mindlessly dark all the time. “the killing joke” “death in the family” “batman’s grave” how about “batman has a nice fucking day for once” huh? “batman chills the fuck out and spends some time with his kids” “batman and the relaxing picnic” “batman has a really good cup of tea and its not poisoned or drugged because he’s been stressed lately” huh???? what about that, assholes.

The batkids do not have a mother to find items for them that they themselves cannot find, so they find the closest replacement at the moment

Bruce:… Tim why is Harley Quinn eating cinnamon rolls in our kitchen Tim: *typing on his phone* oh I couldn’t find my headphones Bruce:… what does that even mean ~ Bruce: *walks into living room*… hello Selina Selina: *watching cartoons with Jason’s head in her lap* oh hey baby! Bruce: w- why are you- not that I’m not happy to see you but why are you here? Selina: kitten needed help finding his helmet.  Jason: *lifts helmet* we found it Bruce:… *walks back out of the living room* ~ Bruce: *staring at Talia* Talia: Hello beloved.  Bruce: … wha- why- how??? Damian: forgive me father but I needed to find my favorite dagger for show and tell tomorrow Bruce:… first of all no- ~ Bruce: *walking into Dicks room* hey Ivy- wait Ivy: oh hey bats! Believe me I don’t want to be here either but baby robin needed help finding his old suit Dick: *lifting his discowing outfit* we found it Bruce:… Ivy I will fund all of your plant experiments if you swear to never find that thing again-

AU where Jason, Cass and Damian meet in the League and cause so much chaos that a burnt out Ra's just dropped them with a note

"Two of them are yours the third one is free"

And Bruce rolls with it

What the Justice Leaguers Do On Their Days Off… I kept cackling at J’onn! 🤣

Demons arriving in Gotham: Finally! A place above earth that is cursed enough! This is perfect! Nothing can-

Jason Todd, whose body is full of concentrated Magical Waters: *walks into the 7/11*

Demons: *immediately disintegrate*

Jason: Huh. Anyway, one coffee and the meatball sub, please

The cashier, who just saw all the other customers in the shop turn into dust: Just take them

Dick, to the Titans: OK this is my little brother, everyone has to be so nice to him!

Jason, 6'4, built like a double fridge and holding a gun: Hey.

The Titans:

Years later.

Dick, to the Titans again: OK this is my even littler brother, everyone be super super nice to him!

Duke, 6'2, built like a linebacker and lit up like a glo stick: Yo.

The Titans:

Years after that.

Dick, again, to the Titans: OK this is my littlest baby brother, everyone has to be so sweet to him! He's a baby!

Damian, 18 and 6'0, made of pure muscle and holding a sword: Greetings.

The Titans: ...where are you finding these brothers.