WORK HARD PARTY HARDER

guy who is definitely not about to fall into a surprise midday nap with an aftermath worse than a hangover: it seems like a really good idea to lay in bed and get cozy under the blanket as part of my plan not to fall asleep. I do not know why.

feels so embarrassing to b hyperfixated on your own oc like the smallest thing that reminds you of them has you giggling and kicking your legs and smiling goofy in public but it’s like sorry everyone i was thinking about shmoopsie from my brain again. yeah the one like max 10 ppl know about

hold on. Was suck him good and hard through his jorts supposed to conjour the image of someone who has an unzipped fly because this entire time I've been imagining someone slurping on wet denim

new holiday declared btw. it's called Scary Christmas. its on January 25th. mark your calendars

i had a dream that due to a botched contract mcdonalds had accidentally agreed to individually sponsor every post on tumblr dot com so the site was unusable because everyone was just posting like 'cock sex cum' and then there'd be a giant integrated SPONSORED BY THE MCDONALDS CORPORATION banner underneath it and mcdonalds was losing millions of dollars on this

hey sorry if i was offputting and strange and bizarre and weird as fuck last night i was just being myself

Oh look, just as fast and dirty as any other April 1st gag bit. Matt, Staff, Automattic, etc, FIX YOUR HEARTS. And do some work on the real problem on here.

how is it mario day and no one posted the essay

happy what do tuesday's tuesday