Your personal Tumblr journey starts here
Atsushi: Why did you cut my leg off!?
Akutagawa: Because you made me mad!
Atsushi: All I said was “Do you want ramen tonight?” And then you cut my leg off!
Akutagawa: I don’t want ramen I want pork buns!
Atsushi: Then tell me like a damn human being not some damn rabid animal! This is why you don’t have any friends!
Sigma: Nikolai. Quick question; what are into?
Nikolai: Let’s see… Blood play, bondage, pet play, maybe impact as long as I’m doing it, maybe a bit of role play, why do you ask?
Sigma: *Horrified* I meant hobbies!
Nikolai: Oh! bird watching and magic tricks!
Fyodor: While you are here I would like to give you a word of advice. Never under any circumstance should you be alone with Nikolai Gogol.
Sigma: Why is that?
Nikolai: *Appears behind Sigma* You’ll find out later.
Sigma: There is a pigeon in the kitchen. I think it’s trying to seduce me.
Fyodor: Tell Nikolai to stop and get back to work.
Nikolai: I am sitting right next to you. What the hell?!
Nikolai: *Meeting Sigma for the first time* Has Fyodor taught you about stranger danger or sexual harassment yet?
Sigma: No?
Nikolai: *grabs Sigma* PERFECT!
Nikolai: I have a sexual fantasy I want to play out.
Fyodor: What is it?
Nikolai: Us in the woods. You running from me. Me chasing you. The moment I catch you. I carve you up like a pumpkin.
Fyodor: How is this a sexual fantasy?
Nikolai: You’ll find out later.
Fyodor: *Holding Dazai down in a bathtub* You are being baptized Dazai!
Chuuya: Keep him there longer I think I see some demons left in him.
Nikolai: October has been here for over a week I wanna so something for Halloween.
Fyodor: Like what?
Nikolai: Oh you know, carve pumpkins, pick apples, murder you and dress you up as a scarecrow….
Atsushi: Don’t serial killer go after the whores first?
Chuuya: *Looks at Dazai* Nice knowing you.
Nikolai: Congratulations! You’ve been promoted to missing person!
Sigma: Again!?
Nikolai: What do you mean again?! Who kidnapped you before me?!
Fyodor: What are you doing?
Nikolai: Decorating the base for Halloween.
Fyodor: Stop it. Bring Bram back inside this instant.
Sigma: Nikolai, we are on the same team. Why are you sending bomb threats to the Casino!?
Nikolai: Because I miss you.
Atsushi: Hey Dazai, do you dress up for Halloween?
Dazai: Yep. Going to dress up as the ugliest thing in the world.
Atsushi: A zombie?
Dazai: Chuuya.
Sigma: Okay Nikolai, humor me. If Fyodor were a demon, how would you go about summoning him?
Nikolai: Let’s see…Cello playing in the background. A few lit lavender candles. Sacrifice a rat or two…
Sigma: Did you…Did you try this before?
Fyodor: *In the next room* Last week!
Ranpo: Candy corn tastes horrible.
Yosano: Then why are you eating it?
Ranpo: *Shrugs* It’s like you hate it and yet still crave it.
Chuuya: *Looking at Lovecraft’s true form* Who do we call for this?
Dazai: Ghostbusters! *Gets punched by Lovecraft into a tree*
Sigma: How many weapons do you even have on you?
Nikolai: Let’s see…
*Uses his overcoat and a pile of weapons fall out*
Nikolai: I think I’m running low.
Sigma: IS THAT A NUKE?!
Sigma: I’ve been noticing that Pumpkin spice is popular around this time.
Nikolai: I mean it’s fine.
Sigma: I can understand coffee, desserts, soaps, and candles…
Nikolai: But?
Sigma: Now they put it in pastas and deodorant?
Nikolai: You forgot chloroform.
Sigma: What?
Sigma: Why did you drop a book on my head?
Nikolai: I wanted to see how sturdy your skull was.
Fyodor: Sigma, you seem happier than usual today, did something good happen?
Sigma: I have obtained a relic that has given me great happiness.
Nikolai: Someone gave him a gun. Fyodor, please take the gun away from him, he’s shot at me twice already…
Fukuzawa: Did you eat that entire bag of Reese’s?
Ranpo: In my defense, I identify as a party.
Fyodor: Nikolai. Why did you throw Holy water at me?
Nikolai: I wanted to test if you really were a demon.
Fyodor: You’re supposed to use the liquid in the bottle, not chuck the whole thing at my head.
Nikolai: Sometimes you need more than just the water.
Fyodor: Sigma is unconscious.
Nikolai: Well if you weren’t a demon you wouldn’t have dodged it. Thus proving you are a demon.
Akutagawa: Have you thought about not being such a crybaby, weretiger?
Atsushi: Have you thought about not looking like an E-boy with a subscription to Victorian Hot Topic?
Dazai: I’m hurt. Carry me.
Chuuya: I’m not your damn servant!
Dazai: But you shot me.
Chuuya: You asked me to.
Dazai: “I was going to say ‘Chuuya shoot me a text when you get me to the station.’ I got to ‘shoot me’ and you didn’t even hesitate.
Chuuya: See you just told me to again *cocks gun*
Dazai: Is this because of what I did last night? I’m sorry!
Nikolai: *picking the petals off a rose* I want to kill him. I don’t want to kill him. I want to kill him. I don’t want to kill him….
Sigma: you need therapy.
Fyodor: Well since it’s just the four of us right now, why don’t you all be honest about how you feel about me.
Sigma: I hate you but I want to stay in my casino.
Bram: I hated you then and I hate you now.
Nikolai: I’m struggling between wanting to stab you or fuck you so I may do both.
Fyodor:
Fyodor: Sigma, how high up is that casino again?
Fyodor: Do you have anything to say Sigma?
Sigma: Hamsters are better than rats.
Nikolai: *gasp*
Fyodor: Take that back or you’re getting shot again.
Fyodor: *watching Nikolai torment Sigma for the 4783 rd time* I’m surrounded by idiots.
Sigma: So what do we do now?
Nikolai: I have a solution.
Sigma: No.
Nikolai: You didn’t hear it!
Sigma: We are not killing him!
Nikolai: I wasn’t even going to suggest that!
Sigma: Then what?
Nikolai: We kidnap him then mutilate his corpse!
Sigma: What are you doing?
Nikolai: Fyodor put me in time out because I nailed Bram’s coffin shut with him inside it.
Sigma: Why?
Nikolai: I was bored. It was fun.
Sigma: What did you learn?
Nikolai: Bram is a snitch.